Your Marriage is Your First Ministry & a Link Up!

I recently received an email from a reader asking me for some advice that I'd like to share with you as well.
  

Dear Jolene,
How do I balance being a wife at the same time while serving in the church as a leader?   Keep in mind, my husband isn't saved yet. We normally have differences & at times I feel like resigning.   What should I do?

I'm so glad this reader wrote in and asked this question because this issue needs to be addressed and in a big way!  Many marriages are crumbling because Godly women are gone from the home and serving in the Church.  Their men have been left to fend for themselves on a constant basis.  A marriage should not be like this, nor would Jesus be too pleased if the marriage is being forsaken so outside ministry can take place.

So this response is to all wives, whether one's husband is saved or not.  Also, if you're involved in outside ministry but you don't hold a position of leadership, the counsel given here is designed to give you clarity regarding your Godly priorities.

My Journey to Becoming a Godly Wife and a Link Up!

This week I received numerous emails, facebook messages and even phone calls from women asking me for marital counsel.  After hearing about their hurts and frustrations my heart was literally grieved for all wives everywhere.  Which, by the way, is an act of God because I'm not a very compassionate gal!  As the Lord continues to bring more and more people to my little online ministry home, it has struck me that I can't help all these women and it has truly pained my heart.


If you've been following my blog for any length of time now, then you already know that I had a past where I denied the existence of God and I was a feminist in every form of the word.  And I wasn't about to submit to some man and sit at home and raise babies!  But one thing I have not shared with you was my understanding or should I say, my lack of understanding, of a Godly marriage.


In all my years of growing up my parents never once slept in the same bed nor did I ever hear them say "I love you" or "I'm sorry" to one another.  I also never saw them hold hands or kiss each other, and the concept of biblical submission and respect was non-existent.  Needless to say, I had a lot to learn about marriage and a great deal to overcome based on what was emulated to me.  Rather than looking to the world for answers or repeating (and justifying) the same behaviors that were taught to me, I sought Godly counsel instead.

4 Essentials Needed When You're in the Wilderness

Wilderness moments.

Times when you question your faith.

Times when you doubt.

Times filled with hurt.

Times when you wander.

Times when you're tempted.

Difficult times.

Bleak times.

Photo credit

Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.  Matthew 4:1

Take a close look at the above verse.

Who led Christ into the wilderness?  Did you catch that it was the Spirit?

When I read that verse and saw who it was that was responsible for the difficult times that Jesus was about to endure, it gave me such great comfort to know that is was the Holy Spirit.

Jesus Christ.   The Son of the Most High God.  The Messiah.  The Savior of the world.  His faith and allegiance to God was about to be tested.

Reading that verse helped me to know that my own wilderness moments were not only allowed by God but they were appointed by Him as well.

Here's what I have learned to take with me while in the wilderness:

The 4 Essentials

• A Guide-  God's Holy Word to guide and direct you in your times of fear, doubt, hurting, temptation, and despair.  Read His word.  Grab hold of it.  Hide it in your heart.  Breathe it in, make it your life and let it define who you are!

The LORD will guide you continually, and satisfy your soul in drought, and strengthen your bones; You shall be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.  Isaiah 58:11

• Shelter-  God's love and protection to strengthen you from the harsh elements and ravenous attacks.

I will abide in Your tabernacle forever; I will trust in the shelter of Your wings. Selah  Psalm 61:4

And there will be a tabernacle for shade in the daytime from the heat, for a place of refuge, and for a shelter from storm and rain.  Isaiah 4:6

• Water- Living water that is.  It is vital for you to cling to Jesus Christ during times of great weakness.

"But whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life."  John 4:14

• An Eternal Perspective- You will feel defeated and possibly lose your way if you're constantly looking at your temporal circumstances.  This time here on earth is not forever.

If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.  Colossians 3:1-3

Do you happen to know what took place and what was said to Jesus right before He was led into the wilderness?

When He had been baptized, Jesus came up immediately from the water; and behold, the heavens were opened to Him, and He saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting upon Him. And suddenly a voice came from heaven, saying, "This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased."

As the Father spoke those words, I personally believe that the Son of Man had a mountaintop experience as He heard them.

Ponder this thought:  Mountaintop experiences are usually followed by times in the wilderness.

After Satan tempted Jesus this is what happened next...

Then the devil left Him, and behold, angels came and ministered to Him.  Matthew 4:11

Make sure you hold tight to the 4 Essentials when the Spirit leads you into the wilderness and don't forget that in God's timing, angels will be sent to minister to you as well!

Live a poured out life for the Master,

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Graceful Faith in the Everyday, The Better Mom, Time-Warp Wife, Growing Home, Women Living Well, Good Morning Girls, A Holy Experience

Wrestling with God

The other day I wrestled with God from morning til night.  I was hearing His voice loud and clear but my flesh and insecurities were speaking louder still.  I guess I was hoping that what I was feeling would change His mind about what He was asking me to do!

It didn't work.  His mind didn't change.

So I battled with Him.  Sometimes reasoning with Him, sometimes pleading with Him and at other times I asked Him if He could give me a different message to deliver to the saints.

Source: Pinterest

 One minute, I was like Jacob who wrestled with God and the next minute I was like Jonah who ran in the complete opposite direction of where God called him.  Yet, my heart was to be like Isaiah who said with a willing and open heart, "Here I am Lord, send me."

Thoughts and questions swirled through my mind:

"How do I reconcile a bold voice that is paired with a sensitive, fragile, and sometimes, insecure heart?"

"How can I diminish the one and strengthen the other?"  "Is that possible?"  "Or is one of the spirit and the other of the flesh?" 

"How do I not say what I am compelled to say?"  "Can I just stick my fingers in my ear and pretend I can't hear the voice of the Lord?"

"Perhaps I can just lead a nice, quiet and non-confrontational life?"

"Can you give me a different ministry, Lord, maybe one that won't hurt so much?"

How about the worship ministry?  Everyone loves to sing praise and worship songs.  Can that be my ministry, and by the way, can you teach me to sing?

His response, "That is not where I called you, Daughter. I gave you your personality, your giftings, your afflictions and convictions, all of which are to be used for Me, to please Me."

It was no coincidence that day that I happened to hear Pastor James MacDonald talk about his own experience as God called him to do something difficult; to confront and rebuke another believer.

James told the story of how he didn't want to and how he hoped the whole situation would just go away.  But God being God, kept prompting His son to rebuke a man he hardly knew.  What's so interesting about this story was that God made it so clear to James as to what to say, and the words were not nice, but rather offensive!

The Lord told him, "tell this man he is a shameless, self-promoter."

"Lord, can you go over that again, because I don’t want to tell him," James replied.

This is what I love about the story (and what the Lord taught me).

James asked the man what it meant to speak the truth in love, (the man used to be a pastor but left the pulpit to publish his books and thus, promoted himself as a result), seeing how he was a former pastor, he was familiar with the verse.

"Love means to put your needs above mine,"  James said.

James went on to tell the man his needs,  "I need you to like me, to respect me and to respect my ministry."

"If I speak the truth in love, I am risking those things.  I am risking rejection.  I am risking persecution.  I am risking my reputation and ministry." ~James MacDonald

When I heard those words it was like the Lord put a blanket over my wrestling soul knowing that I needed to be comforted, knowing that I needed to be wrapped up in His words, knowing that I needed His love and stamp of approval to go where He was sending me.Now based on what I just listened to, one would've thought that I easily submitted to what God was calling me to do.  Ya, well, I'm not a quick learner because I still wrestled with Him!

In my mind I felt that it was appropriate for a pastor to confront and rebuke, but not so much for a woman, namely, me.

If I wasn't convicted enough based on what I just heard, my day was going to get worse because I was  headed out the door for a field trip to the Open Doors, which served persecuted Christians worldwide.

Great men and women of faith laid their lives on the line for Christ in order to preach the Gospel and distribute bibles. Some were martyred for their faith and others were beaten and thrown in prisons.

One man, named Brother Mac was thrown in prison for 30 years because of just that.  At the end of his life he said,

"If I was given a second chance to repeat my decision to follow Christ, even knowing 30 years of prison lay ahead of me, I would make the same decision for Christ as I did before."

I was totally convicted!  What God was calling me to do was nothing compared to what He prompted in the hearts of these believers.

He was asking me to speak the truth in love; to lay down my life and take the time to pour into others knowing full well that they may not receive the message.  This would result in me being rejected.

Can I have a selfless concern for others?  Or am I too self-centered?  Too insecure?  Too worried about what others would say or think about me?  Would the sting of rejection and persecution cause me to not obey the voice of the Lord?

For many years I prayed for healing upon my sick body so I could be used by the Lord and during those years I prayed for the Lord to increase my borders in ministry.   Today, He is doing just that.  I have seen His hand time and time again in my life.  But here I am wrestling with Him and fretting about where He is sending me.

Will I respond like Caleb and Joshua when they spied out the land of Canaan or will I respond like the other 10 spies?

We entered the land you sent us to explore, and it is indeed a bountiful country—a land flowing with milk and honey.  Numbers 13:27  But the people living there are powerful, and their towns are large and fortified. We even saw giants there.  Numbers 13:28

 "Let's go at once to take the land," he said. "We can certainly conquer it!"   Numbers 13:30

Do not rebel against the LORD, and don't be afraid of the people of the land. They are only helpless prey to us! They have no protection, but the LORD is with us! Don't be afraid of them!"   Numbers 14:9

The message that God has given me is not a popular one and at times, it is an offensive one.

To whom can I speak and give warning? Who will listen to me? Their ears are closed so they cannot hear. The word of the LORD is offensive to them; they find no pleasure in it.  Jeremiah 6:10

I won't be received by all and many will criticize me for saying it.  What they don't realize is that I am speaking the truth in love as I willingly lay aside my needs to be accepted and loved by others.  It's certainly not a ministry that many would sign up for that's for sure!  But my life is not my own, it was bought at a price and I want to pour it out for Christ and I want to obey Him.  When my life is over and I am standing face to face with my Creator, I can only hope to hear,

'Well done, my good and faithful servant.  Matthew 25:21

Perhaps God has placed in your heart a message that is hard to deliver or a ministry that He wants you involved in, and you too are wrestling with the Lord.  Do you see giants in the land as well?  Or do you see a land flowing with milk and honey?

It may be hard to enter into the land, but you have the protection of the Lord.

Live a poured out life for the Master,

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Faith. A New Year's Resolution

Christmas has come to an end and the decorations have been put away.  But before we settle into this new year, I thought I would share with you about a wonderful show that I had seen during this past Christmas season.

It was a show stopper to say the least.

It was spectacular and awe-inspiring.

It calmed my heart and brought tears to my eyes.

It reaffirmed to me that God is who He says He is, and it was a reminder of His love towards me.

It was filled with miracles which strengthened my faith.

The star of the show was none other than, OUR SAVIOR as He was taking center stage during my Christmas story.

When scene one opened....

You would have seen me with a heavy heart, a longing heart and try as I might, a trusting heart.  I walked on to the stage with just my chair, my simple prayers and my faith.

So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.  Romans 10:17

And I sat there and waited.... knowing that He was coming and banking on His promises.

Each day I looked all around me wondering in what manner would He display His love during this glorious season of Christmas.  His season.  His redeeming love.  His reason for coming.

This is not really my chair, but I thought it was a pretty picture so I used it anyway. :)

Scene 2 opens and....

He shows up.  He takes center stage.  The spotlight is on Him.  I sit quietly waiting for Him to speak.  To do something.

And then...

His power is displayed with the moving and stirring in the hearts of the Body of Christ.  He uses them as His hands and feet.  Mere vessels chosen by The Great I Am, the Babe in the Manger, to bring Him honor and glory.

I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.  Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.   Psalm 27:13,14

We stand there with Him and bow are heads and are thankful for what He has done for us.

Day after day, He performs a similar act over and over again, yet using different disciples to minister on His behalf.

He brought His goodness in the land of the living, just like His Word says.

He never disappoints, does He?  He may have a different plan than us but never does He forsake us.  We're His kids, remember?

In Scene 3...

My hands and heart are left wide open, letting the Lord paint my dreams, my plans and my future because He is the Master Creator.  In my letting go of expectations and hopes from others and myself, I place those longings on to my Father's shoulders because He can handle them.

He is all-knowing, I am not.

He can see around the bend in the curve, I can not.

He knows what I need, what my husband needs, and what my children need in the coming year, I do not.

He knows what the future holds, I do not.

So with the new year approaching, so comes the thought of resolutions, hopes, and perhaps even some expectations.

We have all heard of the resolutions to be a better you.  Healthier.  Thinner.  Richer.  Fill in the blank.

Or....

A better woman for the Lord.

A better wife if you're married.

A better mom if you've got offspring.

A better daughter, sister, friend.

All good things to aspire to.

Let me challenge and encourage you to go a little deeper.

How about these....

A better glimpse at our Savior.

To know Him more.

To hear His voice.

To discern His Word.

To be filled with His wisdom.

To have a heart that is pliable and open to the leading and convicting of the Holy Spirit.  (This one might hurt a bit because change most likely will need take place in your life.)

As heirs to the throne, we all have an opportunity to see His goodness in the land of the living, but it takes faith.  It takes patience.  It takes a willing and diligent heart. 

Why not make it a resolution of yours?  To build your faith this coming year.  To look for Him each and every day.  To grab your chair as you sit and wait for Him too.  (Fyi:  My chair is in my mind; I try to keep my thoughts on Him as I wait for Him to make His presence known to me.)  If we slow down and quiet ourselves long enough, we'll see Him because He is always there with us.

Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you and strengthen you in this journey.  He'll deliver, I promise. :)

Let Us Bring Him Silver and Gold

I'm not getting my husband a present for Christmas this year and he's not getting me one either.  In fact, my children won't receive any gifts from us as well.  It's not because we have an issue with gift giving, but rather, it's because we don't have any money to buy them.  (The only reason why I am able to write this blog post is because my husband needs the use of the internet for his business!)

Any money that the Lord has given to us has been for the basic necessities of our lives.

It was the same situation last Christmas. :(

Sometimes my heart gets heavy knowing I can't bless my family with things they'd enjoy, but I know it weighs even heavier on my Beloved's heart being that he is a man, the head of our home, and the provider for our family.

So, instead of dwelling on what I won't get or what I can't give in the material sense, I thought about what is it that I can give, in the spiritual sense; knowing that whatever I do give, is like bringing Christ silver and gold.

Let us bring Him silver and gold.

Whether you have a boatload of money in your bank account and you are able to bless others or your pockets are bare, it's what's in your heart that matters to the King of Kings.

So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver.  2 Corinthians 9:7

Perhaps this Christmas you make the decision to give Jesus silver in the form of a loving countenance towards your family rather than a stressed out attitude like Martha.  (Your husband and children will appreciate that.)

Or your silver can be a form of contentment...

• Regardless of what is or isn't under the tree.


• Regardless of who's not treating you in a loving way.


• Regardless of the health challenges you face.


• Regardless of the obstacles that you are dealing with.

Maybe you can give a box of gold to Christ in the form of graciousness that needs to be extended to someone....perhaps that someone is your husband?

Is it quite possible that your husband needs to be appreciated, affirmed and respected more, in spite of your circumstances?  Wouldn't that make a great gift?  I am sure it would bless his heart.

Be creative.  Come up with some of your own ideas of how you can bring the Babe in the manger some silver and gold.  I am sure if you ask the Holy Spirit for some guidance in this area, He will be more than willing to help you!

A  peak inside my heart......♥

My silver and gold for Christ is being content with our situation and letting my husband know just that!  It isn't always easy for me to dwell in Christ because my flesh gets in the way, but I think for one day I can do my best to bring Him silver and gold this Christmas.

Live a poured out life for the Master,

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Thankful for Afflictions

Thanksgiving.  A day when it is a time to be thankful, but sometimes when life is hard, it is difficult to utter a word of thanks.

How could I see good in these afflictions?

Broken relationships with my family
Hurt by Christian women
Struggled in ministry to stay afloat
Years of chronic and debilitating illnesses
Lost of our home (twice)
A Christmas season when we barely had money for food, let alone presents (again)
The inability to pay for our rental home and then having to move again
Living with another family because we didn’t have a place to go
Dealing with my own fears, insecurities, failures, depression and rejection

How do I say, "Thank you Lord, for this life?"

Only because of Him.  Only because of His promises.  Knowing that all things work together for good.

My afflictions have produced good seeds.

They have:

• Strengthened my faith


• Deepened my convictions and resolve


• Brought me closer to Christ


• Weakened me; causing me to cling to Jesus, to rely on His strength rather than my own


• Given me the opportunity to watch for His hand of faithfulness upon my life


• Allowed me, a broken vessel, to be used by Him even though I am unworthy

When the seeds of affliction come falling down into the soil of your life, friend, let the Gardener pour His Living Water over you so you can produce good fruit.

"I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing.  John 15:5

Yes, afflictions are hard in the physical sense, but good for us spiritually.

Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  Philippians 4:11-13

Thankful for my afflictions because without them, I would remain more like me: sinful, selfish me, rather than more like Him.

Be thankful for your afflictions too, friend, because they can produce good fruit in your life as well!

Therefore by Him let us continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His name.  Hebrews 13:15

Live a poured out life for the Master,


I am linked up with:

Not All Mothers and Daughters Get Along, Part 1

For a couple hours now I have been wrestling with the Lord about writing this post...in fact, if you could take a peak inside my heart you could see me pleading with Him about how I am not ready to show some of my scars and how I don't want to be vulnerable and transparent to people that I am afraid to let in.   

I cry out to Him, You are asking me to share a lot.  I am not ready to let down some of my walls.  I don't have the courage to open up to complete strangers.  They will criticize me and reject me, I say to Him.  But my Lord asked me, "Daughter, if you could reach just one woman and minister to her and encourage her or affirm her for My sake, would you be willing to share your scars with her?  Of course, Lord.  Like the words from Isaiah, "Here I am, send me."  Isaiah 6:8  So, I submit to His will and not my own.

For all those daughters out there that do not have the best relationship with their moms, this is written to help you know that you are not alone in your pain and suffering.  The Lord knows all that we need in order to cling to Him and to become more like Him.  He cares about your tears and what you have been through.  For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."  Hebrews 13:5

So here's my story.  I was adopted at birth into a family that already had 3 biological sons of their own.  (My biological parents were 26 and 29 yrs. old when they gave me up for adoption.) I grew up knowing I was adopted and I was told that I was chosen and special, yet, I did not feel like I ever fit in.  For some reason I was never really close to my mom and I am not sure why.  My insecurities developed at a very young age.  I did not have many friends at school and those I did have later rejected me and I was left to myself each afternoon on the playground.  I felt unwanted again.  Because of much hurt, the anger in me quickly became a part of who I was.  Kids called me, "Mean Jolene" (that still hurts to hear it to this day!) and of course that added to my pain and created even more hostility in me.  I lashed out in my anger when I was just in the third grade as I was sent to the Principal's Office for fist fighting!  Of course over the years I put up more walls to protect myself and more pain became my friend, whether it was being sexually molested as a child or just feeling unwanted in my own home.

Then my teen years came.  I never felt that I could please my mom or measure up to her standards, so I stopped trying and I became indifferent and I sought to receive love somewhere else.  Later I had a boy who said he loved me; oh how he broke my heart, again.  More scars and more walls were added along with more bad choices that left me so broken that I wanted to take my own life.  Later as I got older, I lived a life where I denied the existence of God and boy, those sure were some dark years.

Then  I met Jesus Christ.  My Hero showed up on the scene and saved not only the day, but my life as well.

"For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons (& daughters) through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will--to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves." Ephesians 1:4-6 (my paraphrase)

"But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." 1 Peter 2:9



Shortly after I became saved I decided to move back in with my parents so I could be the 'light' and be a witness to them.  Unfortunately, they were not open to my new found faith.  One day in particular I remember sharing with my mom how I asked Jesus to come into my heart, forgive me of my sins and be the Lord of my life.

My mom's response:, "You have just matured, that's all."  I was perplexed by her words.  I thought maybe she did not understand what I said or she did not hear me so I repeated myself.

Her response again was, "You have just matured."  Now, I was not okay with her denying my transformation and denying what God had done in my life, so my old self of being 'Mean-Jolene' came alive, and I fiercely repeated myself for the third time!

Her response, "No, you have just matured, that's all."

In that moment I was saddened by the fact that she had discounted what I had to say and what was taking place in my life, but what she was really doing was rejecting my Savior.  "Remember the word that I said to you, 'A servant is not greater than his master.' If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you." John 15:20

About a year later I was getting married to a wonderful man that God chose specifically for me.  My parents did not approve of my husband-to-be, nor did they approve of my faith and the church we were getting married in, which is still the church we attend to this day.  Mom and I continued to be at odds.  Of course they were invited to my wedding and I hoped they would come but I informed them that in 4 weeks I would be getting married whether they attended or not.  (I did not know if my dad would be walking me down the aisle until the night of the rehearsal when they happened to show up.)

"Do not think that I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to bring peace but a sword.  "For I have come to 'set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law'; "and 'a man's enemies will be those of his own household.'  Matthew 10:34-36

We moved forward in our relationship.  She was respectful of my faith and my marriage.  Within a year of  my wedding, I became pregnant with my firstborn and mom and I became so close.  It was wonderful and she was a fabulous grandma!  I continued to pray for hers and my extended family's salvation.  A year later I became pregnant again.  

Now comes the part in the movie when the music goes bad...really, really bad.  I am going to leave you with a cliff-hanger.  Below are some words that my mother vehemently spewed out to me one afternoon when I was 7 months pregnant.  (Shortly after what was said to me I went into pre-term labor.)

Mom:  "Jolene, if I ever see you spank your child again I am going to call Child Protective Services."

Mom:  "Because you are going to homeschool your children they are going to be withdrawn, socially retarded and they are going to end up in prison." 

Mom:  "Jolene, where do you find these losers"?  (she was referring to my beloved Solomon; my husband Eric.)

Those were some fightin' words and I was ready for a throw-down! By the way, this is all taking place at a Mall!

Let me leave you with this,  "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. " Romans 3:23

I will post Part 2 in the comings days.

I Don't Wanna Be A Peacemaker!

A few months ago, rather than having my eldest son attend his regular Sunday School class, he sat in the sanctuary with us to hear our pastor's message.  We felt it was a good time to expose our son to the adult message to see if he had enough spiritual understanding for it.

The teaching that day was on the Beatitudes, more specifically the 'peacemakers'. 

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God."  Matthew 5:9

After the service, my husband asked our son if he understood the message and he said, "yes" and he also proceeded to tell us that he liked being in the sanctuary rather than his class.  Well , we will give that some thought.

Shortly after church, we headed to our car and as my two boys climbed in the backseat, my eldest (the one who just came out of the service where he heard about peacemakers, started to argue and fight with his younger brother!) my husband gently said to my boy, "Peacemaker".  

My boys' growling response, "I don't wanna be a peacemaker!"

I could not help but laugh hysterically. 

Here's why: my son spoke his heart and he spoke it openly and unashamedly.  After I laughed at him I could see the look of conviction along with embarrassment on his face.  I realized in that moment that my actions could hinder him from wanting to share his heart with me again.  My laughter came across as if I were mocking him, but in reality, I WAS COMPLETELY IDENTIFYING WITH HIM. 

"I do not want to be a peacemaker either", I said to him.  I told him that it is hard for me to be a peacemaker but it is pleasing to Jesus if I do.  I continued to tell him that he just openly said how many adults feel, but they do not express it to others.  I thanked him for sharing his heart and told him there was nothing wrong with the way he felt. 

"Living the 'Narrow Path' is hard to do", I said.

Under his breathe he said, "I am a warrior".  A smile came over my face and I laughed again.  "I am a warrior too, my son", I replied. 

Just like the impetuous Peter, who cut off the servants ear, we can relate to Peter's personality. 

"Then Simon Peter, having a sword, drew it and struck the high priest's servant, and cut off his right ear." John 18:10 

I would imagine Peter had to learn to be a 'peacemaker' and  it was not natural for him either, however, I am sure he did the best he could to please the Lord to live peacefully with all men. 

I told my son that a warrior for the Lord is also a 'peacemaker' because we are showing love to others.  As soldiers in the Lord's army we can help build the Kingdom of God if we exercise restraint and self-control and extend graciousness, mercy, and love to others.  Yes, it is hard to do because we are denying our flesh. 

"I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. " Galatians 5:16  

Perhaps my boy is not quite ready for such a hard lesson and he is still better off to be ministered at his level!  I know the message is hard for me as well.  Lord, help me to walk in the Spirit so I do not satisfy my flesh.

Being a peacemaker is hard, but it is pleasing to the Lord.

Dying to Self...Is It Worth It?

Die to self. We hear this message over and over as Christians, but actually doing it is something all together very challenging. Last month I was reading in the book of Ezekiel, and as I read verse after verse and chapter after chapter, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the poor man based on all that God had asked of him. The Lord wanted Ezekiel to do some pretty tough things for Him and I couldn’t help but wonder if I were in that situation would I be as obedient and faithful to God as Ezekiel was? Would I die to myself like that?

Let me give you a brief summary of Ezekiel’s story.

He was carried off with the Jewish exiles to Babylon, and while there, he became a prophet of God. The message that he spoke was one of coming judgment for those still in Jerusalem. Unfortunately, though, his preaching was not well received by the Jews that were with him in captivity. 39 out of the 48 chapters of this book, Ezekiel warned of the coming wrath from the Lord. Destruction, disaster and doom were going to take place because of the peoples’ idolatry, wickedness and rebellion. It was a fun read. (sarcasm noted)

Now, we all have trials and at times, life can become very problematic, tiresome, and downright painful but after I finished reading this book, I thought to myself, “I have no trials and what God asks of me is nothing compared to what He had asked of Ezekiel.”

Read the following portions of Scripture and you will see for yourself some of the shocking things that Ezekiel went through. I am sure after you read it, you won’t think your life is so hard either!

"Stand up, son of man," said the voice. "I want to speak with you." The Spirit came into me as he spoke, and he set me on my feet. I listened carefully to his words. "Son of man," he said, "I am sending you to the nation of Israel, a rebellious nation that has rebelled against me. They and their ancestors have been rebelling against me to this very day. They are a stubborn and hard-hearted people. But I am sending you to say to them, 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says! 'And whether they listen or refuse to listen—for remember, they are rebels—at least they will know they have had a prophet among them. "Son of man, do not fear them or their words. Don't be afraid even though their threats surround you like nettles and briers and stinging scorpions. Do not be dismayed by their dark scowls, even though they are rebels. You must give them my messages whether they listen or not. But they won't listen, for they are completely rebellious! Son of man, listen to what I say to you. Do not join them in their rebellion. Open your mouth, and eat what I give you." Ezekiel 2:1-8

"The voice said to me, "Son of man, eat what I am giving you—eat this scroll! Then go and give its message to the people of Israel." So I opened my mouth, and he fed me the scroll. "Fill your stomach with this," he said. And when I ate it, it tasted as sweet as honey in my mouth." Ezekiel 3:1-3

Now, I don’t know about you, but that is not a very encouraging ministry to be a part of!

Think about it for a moment. God is telling you to go speak with His people, but by the way, they are not going to listen to you. They will threaten you and treat you harshly. Hmmm, I doubt that there would be a long line of people waiting to sign up to serve in that church ministry!

Let’s keep reading about our good man, Zeke.

"Son of man, go to the people of Israel and give them my messages. I am not sending you to a foreign people whose language you cannot understand. No, I am not sending you to people with strange and difficult speech. If I did, they would listen! But the people of Israel won't listen to you any more than they listen to me! For the whole lot of them are hard-hearted and stubborn. But look, I have made you as obstinate and hard-hearted as they are. I have made your forehead as hard as the hardest rock! So don't be afraid of them or fear their angry looks, even though they are rebels." Ezekiel 3:4-9 Then go to your people in exile and say to them, 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says!' Do this whether they listen to you or not." Ezekiel 3:11

Just envision for a moment you're walking into a room filled with people like that and you have to give them a message of repentance! Generally, a message of repentance will not produce people who will like you. I am sure you would not walk out with many new friends, but rather lots of enemies!

God used the obstinate, Ezekiel to give a difficult, hard-to-swallow message to other stubborn people. For all of us that are hard-headed….God has a great plan for us as well! Since I am included in this list, I prefer to use a much nicer word like 'tenacious' instead. (smile) Maybe you're not like this, but you have a kid who is. Keep praying for them to be used by the Lord. God created them in a certain way just for His pleasure and purpose. He gave me one too! (smile)

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them." Ephesians 2:10

Let’s continue with our obstinate prophet’s story.

Prepare and eat this food as you would barley cakes. While all the people are watching, bake it over a fire using dried human dung as fuel and then eat the bread. Then the LORD said, "This is how Israel will eat defiled bread in the Gentile lands to which I will banish them!" Then I said, "O Sovereign LORD, must I be defiled by using human dung? For I have never been defiled before. From the time I was a child until now I have never eaten any animal that died of sickness or was killed by other animals. I have never eaten any meat forbidden by the law." "All right," the LORD said. "You may bake your bread with cow dung instead of human dung." Ezekiel 4:12-15

Sounds delicious doesn’t it?

When you read this, you can’t help but be thankful for the food you have in your pantry. As Ezekiel is cooking his food over dung, it is kinda hard to complain that you can’t afford to go out to dinner?

If you want your life to get easier, change your perspective.

Now here’s the part of Ezekiel’s story that broke my heart.

"Son of man, with one blow I will take away your dearest treasure. Yet you must not show any sorrow at her death. Do not weep; let there be no tears. Groan silently, but let there be no wailing at her grave. Do not uncover your head or take off your sandals. Do not perform the usual rituals of mourning or accept any food brought to you by consoling friends." So I proclaimed this to the people the next morning, and in the evening my wife died. The next morning I did everything I had been told to do." Ezekiel 24:16-18

This portion of the Scriptures was difficult for me to read.

Ezekiel had already endured so much persecution and physical hardship (which I did not recount in this post) and I could not help but wonder why God would take away his wife and then have him not mourn about it. Poor guy!

Yet, here you have in Ezekiel 24:18,

"The next morning I did everything I had been told to do."

Bottom line: Ezekiel was obedient to the Lord regardless of what God had called him to do, regardless of what the Lord took him through, and regardless of what the Lord took away from him.

What a beautiful example of a God-fearing man. Ezekiel was more concerned about satisfying the Spirit rather than his flesh. He died to self. We can all learn a lesson from him.

Keep reading... the story gets better.

“During the twenty-fifth year of our captivity—fourteen years after the fall of Jerusalem—the LORD took hold of me. In a vision from God he took me to the land of Israel and set me down on a very high mountain. From there I could see toward the south what appeared to be a city. As he brought me nearer, I saw a man whose face shone like bronze standing beside a gateway entrance. He was holding in his hand a linen measuring cord and a measuring rod. He said to me, "Son of man, watch and listen. Pay close attention to everything I show you. You have been brought here so I can show you many things. Then you will return to the people of Israel and tell them everything you have seen." Ezekiel 40:1-4

God gave Ezekiel a vision of the new temple area along with the rooms for the priests, the altar, the division of land, etc. Imagine if you received a vision like that from the Lord.

Now here comes the best part of the story. My heart beats fast just reading this passage!

"After this, the man brought me back around to the east gateway. Suddenly, the glory of the God of Israel appeared from the east. The sound of his coming was like the roar of rushing waters, and the whole landscape shone with his glory. This vision was just like the others I had seen, first by the Kebar River and then when he came to destroy Jerusalem. I fell face down on the ground. And the glory of the LORD came into the Temple through the east gateway. Then the Spirit took me up and brought me into the inner courtyard, and the glory of the LORD filled the Temple. And I heard someone speaking to me from within the Temple, while the man who had been measuring stood beside me. The LORD said to me, "Son of man, this is the place of my throne and the place where I will rest my feet. I will live here forever among the people of Israel. They and their kings will not defile my holy name any longer by their adulterous worship of other gods or by honoring the relics of their kings who have died." Ezekiel 43:1-7

Oh, to see the glory of the Lord! Wow, to be Ezekiel, what an honor for him. Yes, he did go through some horrendous stuff….stuff I don’t care to go through, yet, look at what the Lord entrusted him with? Can you see how Ezekiel continually died to himself and how the Lord blessed him? I do hope so!

We all want to be used in a nice, easy and uplifting way but sometimes that is not a part of God’s plan.
· Sometimes we are called to minister to rebellious and obstinate people; maybe even to those in our own family.
· Sometimes we are asked to endure a difficult life filled with persecutions and hardships.
· Sometimes we have to eat things that don’t taste very good (those that are on special diets for health reasons know what I am talking about!)
· Or for those who have endured the greatest of grief and sorrow because they have lost a loved one way too soon.

God has entrusted you with a great message; a message of Hope. I am sure He is either taking you through something very difficult or He is asking you to do something that you don't want to do, either way He wants you to DIE TO SELF. When you do that, not only do you bring Him glory, but in His timing, He reveals to you His glory as well. It is beautiful and it is worth all our pain and suffering.

Now don't think for one minute that I am always dying to myself...because I am not. I am a work in progress and I need to learn to daily lay down my life for Christ. In the meantime, I hoping to indulge myself in a bowl of ice cream tonight!

God ALWAYS has a wonderful plan for His children...we just need to remember that we are not here on earth to build our kingdom, but we are here to build His Kingdom.

Dying to self is worth it because we show others our hope in Christ; which is a way His glory is revealed.

Are You a Courageous Woman?

Recently, my family and I were given tickets to the movie, Courageous.  Not knowing much about the film other than the fact that it was made by the same folks who produced Facing the Giants and Fireproof, I was really looking forward to seeing it.

After watching this wonderful, phenomenal, God-fearing, and biblically accurate (according to a man's biblical role in life, that is) show, I was shocked and ever-so touched by how well the movie turned out! The writers and producers presented a VERY powerful message as the story line portrayed how men should act as God-fearing fathers, protectors and leaders of their families.

I am sure every woman that walked out of the theater was thankful that her husband, son, father, brother, or any other male by her side, saw that movie.  It was such a strong, God-breathed message on film that I have a hard time thinking the men that saw that show were not challenged to rise to the occasion  in some sort of way.  If you have seen the movie, then you know what I am talking about.

Now, I have the privilege to be married to a man that has walked with his Savior for over 40 years now.  (He gave his heart to Christ when he was just a boy at age 7 and has faithfully followed Him since.)  By the way, after 13 years of marriage, I do not feel worthy to be his wife.  When I met him, I would refer to him as my 'Solomon' and I was his Shulamite woman.  And still to this day, I sign his cards to 'My Solomon', From, Your Shulamite.  I believe I got the better end of the deal in our marriage.  hehe!

Anyways, my point being is this.  My man does his best to follow the Lord and he faithfully tries to be the God-fearing husband and father that is laid out in the Scriptures.  Of course he fails and sins just like the rest of us.

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.  Romans 3:23

Here's my point:  Even though my husband follows Christ to the best of his ability, the movie still brought a conviction to his heart knowing that he could do better in his role as a husband and father. 

Anyways, we left the theater that day and my husband said the message of the movie could make a huge impact on the men in this world and I wholeheartedly agreed.

But then I made this statement,

The sad thing is, I do not believe producers would ever make this kind of movie to encourage women to be God-fearing wives and mothers.

I went on to say,

"I just couldn't see many women lining up to buy a movie ticket in order to learn how to submit, respect, and honor their husbands, nor could I see many women wanting to know how to better serve and instruct their children!  It just wouldn't happen in our society."

I wondered how many women already knew the story line of Courageous and they either manipulated, nagged, or dragged their husband to see that film in hopes that their man would be a better husband or father as a result of the show?  How many women walked out of the theater disappointed that her husband was not a man of God like the ones portrayed on the screen?

Imagine for a moment if someone produced a movie to encourage women to be better wives or mothers.  How many men would like to take their wives to go see it?  I am sure A LOT!  How many women would be angry that their husbands took them to see that movie?

Of course all of this is speculation but our society today is so feminine dominate and it is constantly beating down men and emasculating them.

My spirit was grieved just thinking about how the movie of Courageous probably wouldn't be reversed for women because it wouldn't be received.

The biblical role of womanhood is so misunderstood, frowned upon and demoralized by those in and out of the church today.  Btw, it is usually a woman who has an issue with biblical womanhood and not a man, (not always the case, but usually.)  Note:  before I came to Christ, I WAS ONE OF THOSE WOMEN!

So I had this thought.  If I couldn't see a movie made for us, how about it if God-fearing women made their own Courageous Resolution on paper?

A Resolution that stood for what the Bible had to say about our role as wives and mothers.

Could we make an impact through the blogosphere and social media letting other women know it is okay (and wonderful, I might add) to live out a life according to God's Word?

Well I don't know how much of an impact can be made, but I have made up my mind to do something about it!

Here is A Woman's Courageous Resolution that I have made just for the above purpose!

Post it, share it, reprint it, frame it.  LIVE IT!

This is where I stand!  Will you stand with me?

I WILL diligently pursue Christ with my whole heart.

I WILL submit to my husband as the leader of my home, knowing that it is God who has appointed him as my headship.

I WILL diligently give my husband honor and respect.

I WILL be a helpmate to my husband, coming alongside of him as he leads our family for Christ.

I WILL share my heart with my husband so he can learn to dwell with me with understanding, rather than shout my words like a contentious woman or stuff my feelings and allow bitterness to grow in our marriage.

I WILL be faithful to my husband both physically and emotionally.

I WILL diligently serve my husband and my children with a loving and kind heart.

I WILL train up my children in the ways of the LORD as I nurture and instruct them.

I WILL seek to be content and have a cheerful heart as I keep our home.

I WILL be mindful of how much time I spend doing other activities or ministries that may hinder me from serving my family first.

I WILL forgive others who have hurt me and restore the relationship of those that I have offended.

As Christ has poured out His life for me, I WILL seek to pour out my life for Christ as I pour into the lives of my husband and children.

A woman who fears the LORD shall be praised.  

Proverbs 31:30

Let's take the stand together,

I am linked up with

The Sting of a Christian Woman

Since you are reading this post, I could betcha a dollar that you too, have felt the sting by another Christian woman.  Boy, the knife sure goes down deep in the heart on that one!

Let's read, what I will refer to as, The Stinging Sisters List, shall we?

• Betrayed


• Criticized


• Condemned


• Talked about behind your back- and I don't mean they were praying for you either; most likely they were talking some smack about you and it was gossip and/or slander!
  


• Lied to


• Stole from


• How about this one:  flirted with your man! I am so not okay with that one, in fact, my fists might even come out swinging!  Woman, you better back up before you get hurt!


• Hindered you in the ministry that God has called you to- this one saddens my spirit deeply.  Sometimes to follow the Lord's leading it takes a GREAT amount of faith to get out of the boat and walk on water to Jesus.  He has called you to do something that you do not feel qualified nor equipped to do and now a Sister in Christ has stumbled you from following the Lord in ministry.  Satan LOVES this one...actually, he loves all of the above.

I am sure you can add to, The Stinging Sisters List, but you get my point.

Confession time:  because I don't think I can write a post without being completely honest and real with you.  As I looked back through The List, unfortunately over the years as I was growing in Christ (and still growing), you could find my name written down in several of those sections.  Ouch!

"...for the accuser of our brethren, (Satan) who accused them (believers) before our God day and night, has been cast down."  Revelation 12:10 (my emphasis)

I don't know about you, but the last thing I want in my heart is tear down another Sister in Christ.  Satan does not need any more help in that department and I don't want to be aligned with him.

So, why do we do it?  Why do we tear down another woman?  I pondered that question for quite some time and here were some of my thoughts:

• Insecurity


• Fear


• Doubt


• Guilt


• Control


• Pride


• Competition
  

All of the above actions happen when we are in the flesh and not in the Spirit.  They all have to do with 'self'.  We are often taught in this world to have self-confidence and be self-reliant.  (By the way, there is nothing wrong with feeling like you can make your own breakfast...that's not the type of self-confidence and self-reliance I am referring to!)  It is when those attributes lead to self-centeredness and you become self-absorbed.  As God's daughters we should seek to have God's-confidence and become God-reliant rather than self.

When we take our eyes off of us (self) and we put it on the Lord, then we will not see our Sisters in Christ as a threat to us, we won't feel insecure nor will we have fear or doubt about who we are in Christ.  When our eyes are fixed on Him, then we can encourage our Sisters rather than belittle them, criticize, condemn, and compete with them.

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.  Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.  Philippians 2:3,4 

I'd like to pretend I never read those verses, except for the part where it says someone should look out for my interests! 

I have only scratched the surface with this topic and I want to share more about how to handle the hurt and get over the pain, so look for future posts!

Live a poured out life for the Master,

Ever Question God?

I was angry at God the other day, (but I have since repented, lol). I was bent out of shape because I had to move again for the 4^th time in the last 18 months.  Now, these moves have not been the kind of moves that are filled with happiness and excitement, but rather they are filled with snappy attitudes, weariness, broken dreams and disappointment.  (And by the way, I am not married to a man who is in the military and we are not missionaries.  We are just your ordinary family trying to get by in this fallen world.)

As I stood in the kitchen of our rental home unpacking pots and pans again, I soon became disheartened and my heart sank and my flesh gave way.  Trials.  Tribulations.  Long-suffering.  Heartache.  (Ughh!)

How much longer, Lord? 

How much more will You take my children, my husband and myself through?    

Will You uproot us from this place as well?  

All those questions ran through my mind and the little seeds of anger and self-entitlement started to sprout in my wicked heart that morning.   

Did you happen to notice how I was cleverly questioning what the Lord was doing in my life?

Interestingly enough, just two days earlier I sat for a few moments to write a new post on marriage, (well that didn't happen) because the Lord felt it fit for me to learn a few more things about Him, Job and his sufferings, along with Satan and what God would allow him to do.  As I studied the scriptures, I had a hard time swallowing what the Lord had to say to Satan in regards to Job’s life, (and mine as well).

Picture this scene in your mind’s eye for just a moment.

God is seated on His throne in heaven and angels come to present themselves before the Lord, along with Satan. (Job 1:6)  The Almighty God asks Satan where he is coming from and Satan replies, “From to and fro on the earth and from walking back and forth on it.

Can you see that scene, dear sister?  Satan is roaming the earth, seeking whom he may devour.  Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.  1 Peter 5:8

Now here’s come the part of the story that was painful to read because it is just a matter of time before that same statement will apply to either you or me!

As Satan tells the Lord that he has been walking back and forth on the earth, the Lord says to him, “Have you considered My servant Job, that there is none like him on earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil?”  Job 1:8

Think about that statement for just a moment and let it sink into your brain.  Now, take a look at your trials and apply the above verse to you.

“Have you considered my servant (insert your name).”

Whatever is going on in your life, God is ALLOWING it to take place!

The conversation between the Lord and Satan continues on in Chapter 1 of Job.  Satan basically tells the Lord that the reason why Job is a man who fears God is because the Lord has blessed the work of Job’s hands by providing him with many riches.  Satan further says that the Lord has protected Job by putting up a hedge around him and all his household.  In other words, Satan basically said,  Of course Job is righteous and fears You God, because you have abundantly blessed him!  Snicker, snicker, with a hint of sarcasm. 

Satan continues to say to the Lord, “But now, stretch out Your hand and touch all that he has, and he will surely curse You to Your face!”

Here’s the Lord’s response.  “Behold, all that he has is in your power; only do not lay a hand on his person.”  Job 1:12 (later in the story, God allowed Satan to bring devastation to Job's body as well.)

Let me show you something in this verse:  God knew the heart of Job and He knew that Job could go through his trials and thus, God allowed Satan to harm Job.  The Lord knew Job better than Satan did.

The Lord knows our hearts and minds as well and He knows us better than the enemy.  He knows that you and I can go through the trials that He has already sifted through His hands.

Here's 5 Things to Know About the Enemy (in case you were wondering!)

1.  Satan is accountable to God.  (Job 1:6)

2.  Satan is a created being, he is finite.  He is not all-powerful and he can only be in one place at a time. (Job 1:7)  Although he does have his demonic minions running around trying to trip us up.

3.  Satan can tempt us, but he cannot know what we are thinking nor can he foretell our future.  (Job 1:9-11)

4.  SATAN CAN DO NOTHING TO US WITHOUT THE LORD’S PERMISSION! (Job 1:6-12)  Love this!!!

5.  God actively restrains Satan.  (Job 1:12; 2:6)

We can be confident that with God’s power we can overcome Satan.

Satan does not have free reign to do whatever evil he wishes.  God is still, and will always be, sovereign.

Yes, God ALLOWED Satan to test Job for a time. But God also delivered Job from suffering, he restored him and blessed him even more.

As Job endured much, he asked the Lord the 'why' question?  Yet, God never gave Job the answer, instead God asked Job many questions.

God may never give you or I the answer to our 'why' as well, but here is something for you to think about:

The scriptures say that as Believers we are to be set apart for God’s holy purpose.  Did it ever occur to you that the purpose God had in mind for your life was to go through trials faithfully and obediently the way Job did?  “Behold, we consider those blessed who remained steadfast.  You have heard of the steadfastness of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful.”  James 5:11

In the end,  Job responded to the Lord, "Behold, I am vile; What shall I answer You? I lay my hand over my mouth."  Job 40:4  (You can add vile to the list next to my wicked heart as well.)

 

Although our lives may be filled with pain, there is a purpose for it and we never need to question God, because He is sovereign. 

Were you encouraged by what you read?  Become a 'friend' or subscribe to The Alabaster Jar where future posts will be emailed directly to you.

Dealing with Discontentment

Today I was in the process of grabbing food from my refrigerator so I could make lunch for my family.  Sounds like an ordinary afternoon, right?  However, my refrigerator is not in my house but in my friends' garage.  I quickly became distracted by all the stuff that was surrounding me and unfortunately, I immediately became discontent with my situation.

For those of you that are new to The Alabaster Jar, my family and I don’t have a place to call our own yet. We are currently living with close family friends. All of our belongings (earthly possessions) are piled up in our friends’ garage, and yes, that does include my underwear!  You can read more of my story here at: How to Lose Your Dream Home Not Just Once, But Twice

My dresser filled with my clothes.

There are many things in my life today that can cause me to be discontent, especially if I look in the mirror and see my thinning hair, my extra, unwanted pounds and the wrinkles on my face.  Oh, and I can't forget those natural highlights called 'gray hair'.  But the discontentment that I faced today included my living situation.


It is very easy in this world to live a discontented life if we allow our minds to go there.

Here are some things that can trigger discontentment:

• Dealing with difficult or broken relationships

• Feeling lonely

• Longing to be married or strains on your marriage

• Financial hardships

• Chronic illnesses
The list could go on and on.

With the world surrounding us, it tells us we should have:

• a bigger house

• a nicer car

• the latest fashions

• our children need to be in the best schools, (or use the best curriculum if we homeschool)

• we should look younger and be thinner

There is nothing inherently wrong with these things, unless of course we are looking for them to fulfill us; which is the root of the problem.

I think discontentment runs in our blood.  Generally speaking, I personally think that women are more prone to being discontent more than men are.

For example, take a look at Adam and Eve. Adam was content to eat from all the other trees in the garden, except from the one that was forbidden by God. It was Eve who was discontent with all that was given to her. She just had to have MORE than what the Creator of the Universe provided for her!

Then there’s Sarah. Oh Sarah… what a discontented woman she was! She wasn’t happy about the fact that she still had not bore any children with Abraham. So what does she do? She takes matters into her own hands thinking of course that by doing so, she will become content. Wrong! Because of this, she makes an even bigger mess out of her life.

She had her maidservant, Hagar, sleep with her husband so she can bear children for Sarah. Soon Hagar becomes pregnant, just like Sarah had wanted, but then Sarah becomes discontent (again!) because Hagar was carrying Abraham’s child. Ridiculous! There was no pleasing this woman. She wanted to eat her cake and have it too!

We can become constant drippings... like a dripping faucet. Drip. Drip. Drip. The thought of that sound alone grates on my nerves.

Imagine how we sound when we act and say things over, and over, and over like a constant dripping faucet? Annoying! Who would want to be around a woman like that?

Repeatedly in the Holy Scriptures we see the admonition to the women about our attitudes.   Ladies, if you are not married, don’t discard this admonition because you can still apply it to your lives.

“The contentions of a wife are a continual dripping.” Proverbs 19:23

“A continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.” Proverbs 27:15

Definition of contentment: satisfaction with what one has

1) a perfect condition of life in which no aid or support is needed

2) sufficiency of the necessities of life

3) a mind contented with its lot, contentment

Contentment will come to us when we focus on the things of the Lord and not on the things of this world.  

“And God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others.” 2 Corinthians 9:8

It is only when we live for Jesus Christ, pursuing Him, knowing Him, and serving Him that will we become content. The pursuit of things that are not lasting, things that will pass away, will eventually lead to our discontentment.

Tips to fill you with contentment:

• • Pray. Ask for the Lord’s strength to protect you from the trappings and deception of the Enemy. (Remember Eve?)


• • Hide God’s Word in your heart and meditate on the Scriptures.


• • Join a Bible study


• • Listen to praise and worship music throughout the day. (if possible)


• • Spend time in fellowship with other strong women of faith…not just girlfriends, but women who desire to know more of Jesus and who want to spend their time talking about Him! If you don’t have friends like this, PRAY, and in time, the Lord will bring you some!


• • Change your perspective from having the things of this ‘world’ to having your eyes on eternity. This alone will make a HUGE impact on your day.


• • Serve the Lord rather than yourself.


• • Ask yourself what is it that you pursue? What are your priorities? Will those things draw you closer to Jesus? Or will you be drawn further away from Him and His presence?

Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls. Proverbs 25:28 (I’m gonna try and not have cake tonight!)

The key to contentment in one’s life is the relationship you have with Christ. Knowing who He is as you continually seek Him and realizing who you are in Him is where content will be found! “Now godliness with contentment is great gain.” 1 Timothy 6:6

For those that are married, you can read my post here called, Discontentment in Your Marriage.

 

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