Top 15 Ways a Wife Can Strengthen Her Marriage

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, 

but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones. 

Proverbs 12:4

Are You More Like His Mother or His Lover?

The need to control.  That's what we do as wives.

It's our flesh seeping out and if we can't get it under control, then our marital oneness will start to erode.

And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.  Genesis 3:16 (NLT)

Here's what mothering our men looks like:

We tell him he doesn't know how to parent, how to handle finances, how to lead the family, or even how to buy groceries!  Don't believe me on this?  Take a look around at our society and you'll see how we're being conditioned by the world as they tell us that men are a bunch of idiots, completely incompetent to handle even the smallest tasks.

Can you just let things go and enjoy the man you married?

Continue reading here where I'm guest posting today at Unveiled Wife!

Live a poured out life for Christ,

Did you enjoy reading The Alabaster Jar?

To receive future posts you can subscribe via email and Facebook.

The Transformed Wife

13 Wives in 13 Days...Wives of the Bible Series

Wife #13

This wife had a lot of brokenness.

But instead of choosing bitterness, she chose to become better.  And she did so when she walked by faith.

The Lord redeemed her.

And through His mighty hand, she became joyful and transformed.

Who is she?

She's Sarah, wife of Abraham.

The Enticing Wife

13 Wives in 13 Days...Wives of the Bible Series

Wife #9

She's insecure with her outer appearance.  (I love her already!)

She let's her husband sexually delight in her.

She sexually delights in her man.

But then she rejects him.   Later, she realizes she's made a mistake so she goes after him.

So who is she?

She's the Shulamite Woman, also known as Solomon's Wife.

Learning from the Wives of the Bible Series

I've decided to write a series called, Wives of the Bible; What to Do and What Not to Do Based on the Lives of these Women, as I blog every day for the next 13 days of my 1/2 marathon of blogging.   

I hope you'll join me each day as I discuss these wives because many of them are a crack up!  Some of them are so Godly and I try to emulate my life after them and others, well, let's just say I've never seen such poor decision-making in all my life!

We'll glimpse into the lives of the many infamous and not so famous wives of the Bible.  Ranging from Eve, to Sarah, to Esther, all the way to the obscure, Pontius Pilate's wife. 

9 Things About My Sex Life that I'd Share with a Young Wife

For those of you that don't already know some of my story, my man and I were not virgins when we married.  He was married once before, as was I.  However, when we dated and were engaged, we remained pure until our wedding night where we could receive our beautiful wedding gift from God; sex!

Looking back over the past 14 years of our marriage, I kinda feel like our sex life was ripped away from us within the first 2 years of our marriage because of the ravages of illnesses, birthing babies, hormonal imbalances, and of course, trials.

Photo Source

Elizabeth, from Warrior Wives asked us older women, (over 40) to share our insights and experiences of how our sex lives have changed over the years. Her desire is for us old ladies (smile) to pass on what we've learned to the younger wives.  So, today I'm doing just that!

You can read the rest of my post over at Warrior Wives.

Live a poured out life for Christ,

Did you enjoy reading The Alabaster Jar?

To receive future posts you can subscribe via email and Facebook.

I'm linking up with:  Unveiled Wife,

Stay Engaged to the One You're Married To...& a Link Up!

Do you remember the time of your wedding engagement?  How you were just so giddy and in love with your man?  You longed to see him.  Perhaps you couldn't wait to be held in his arms and receive that sweet tender kiss from him.  And you were so filled with excitement and anticipation as you were about to become his wife! 

He wooed you didn't he?  Pursued you?  Hung on your every word?  Complimented you?  You felt treasured and special.  You knew he was the one for you.

But now that you're married, it's easy to see the problems, bad habits, self-centeredness, and insensitivities that he has.  Your man is no longer focused on you because his focus has shifted. (Just like yours has.)  Perhaps now your husband is consumed with providing for you and the kids. Maybe he's focused on schooling or finding a new career, job, or building a business.  Perhaps he has fallen and gotten knocked down in life.  Maybe he has experienced a chronic and debilitating illness or lost a job or maybe he just can't figure life out and he's having a hard time getting back up again.  

The Main Ingredient to Grow Your Marriage

Today I spent some time thinking about you, dear reader.  Yes, you.   My recent post, 20 Reasons a Wife Doesn't Want to Have Sex, has stirred up some openness in women as they've shared their hearts and hurts on infidelity, pornography, sexual abuse, marital/sexual problems, etc.  

I've read countless testimonies and comments from hurting wives all over the internet and my heart is just broken for all who are in painful and struggling marriages.  I literally wept for you.  I know that sounds absurd, but it's true.  

Now let me just say right now that I'm not the weepy, overly-emotional, feeling-oriented, type of gal.  And being a woman, I'm not sure why that is.  I've often thought it was because I had more testosterone in my body than most women.  Or maybe it was because I was raised with all boys and have boys myself.  Soft and delicate are two words that are not common in my vocabulary.  Or perhaps it's all the walls that I've built around me that keeps me somewhat numb, closed off.  I tell you all this because it's not in my fleshly nature to be so open and compassionate to....a complete stranger.  I'm more of the reserved kinda personality.  Guarded is a better word for it.  I tend to keep people at arms distance for fear that I might be rejected or attacked.  Yeah, that's how I roll. (And no, it's not that time of the month for me, either!)

Anyways, I tell you this because God was moving in my heart for you.  So I wanted to share with you something that will help you grow your marriage, no matter how good, bad or ugly it is.  

20 Reasons a Wife Doesn't Want to Have Sex...& a Link Up!

Many, many years ago I couldn't wait to experience my honeymoon.  The day when I could finally know my husband on a sexual level.  But now the honeymoon is over and real life has begun. Yet, I can't help but think back to that first night, as well as, the early months of our relationship.  Oh how I longed to be with him!  And the idea of not desiring to be intimate with my husband was never a thought that crossed my mind.  But after 14 yeas of marriage, that newness that was once there has diminished, and life has crept into our relationship.

So this got me to thinking about wives in general.  I often hear how many of them don’t have much of a desire to be sexually intimate with their man.  And I have wondered what has changed for them.  You see, I personally do not believe that any new bride had intentions of avoiding or depriving her man of sex when she said yes to his marriage proposal.  But something has happened in their marriage.  There is a break down of some sort that is causing her to turn away from him intimately.  

Get Physical & a Marital Oneness Monday Link Up!

I’m so excited to have my sweet friend, Pearl from Pearl's Oysterbed, on The Alabaster Jar!  Today she's going to be sharing on s*xual intimacy (because that's her thing to write about!) but before we get into the post, I wanted to say a few things.

First, if you're a single woman, then stop right here.  This post is for married women so please don't read any further since this topic does not apply to your life at this time. Let's not stir up love until it's appropriate time, shall we?

Second, allow me to introduce you to Pearl!

The grittiness of life has helped shape Pearl.  Her luster comes from layers of experience and HOPE from the beloved Word of God.  Pearl has parented children with learning issues, has navigated the genepool of mental illness, and has dealt with marital conflict and sexual fulfillment issues.  Pearl focuses on sexual intimacy and restoring waning female libido.  She wishes to share HOPE with her beautiful readers to help them understand their men, marriage and sex.  Swim on over to Pearl's OysterBed where the water is fine!

So let's give Pearl a big welcome to The Alabaster Jar because she wrote this post just for you!

A Fulfilling Intimacy Life

I had a reader ask me a question about how do good Christian women keep a healthy and fulfilling intimate life with our husbands based on all the immodesty that surrounds us, along with all the immoral women out in the world. 

So, today, I am going to address just the first part of that question and then in another post, I'll address the rest of it.


But before I answer, let me give you a little background first.

Before I came to Christ, I acted like the immoral woman; immodesty and all. But when I married my Beloved, I was a Christian but I had a very difficult time in my mind learning how to reconcile my old ways with my new ones.   Of course I learned a few things based on what I read in God's Word and one of those things was to keep the marriage bed pure and to not have sex outside of marriage.

So, my man and I waited to have sex until our wedding night.  Yes, it was very difficult to wait, but it was the right thing to do in God's eyes.  But here's something that I struggled with regarding intimacy:  I was unsure of how to act.  I certainly couldn't act like the tramp immoral woman I once was!  But the opposite of that was to be the good, Christian woman, but I didn't know what that looked like in the marriage bed.

I didn't have any godly women in my life teaching me those things.  What would be considered modest or immodest?  What's appropriate in my marriage bed and what isn't?  What do I show my husband and what don't I show him?  All those questions ran through my mind and it was all very difficult for me.   I think at one point I would have swung towards having a prudish attitude based on what I perceived from other Christian women.   But, I wanted the straight Truth, so I searched the scriptures for the answers.

What I found in God's Word was the furthest thing from a frigid or prudish wife!

So, I had resolved in my mind that I wouldn't turn my Beloved away whenever he wanted to be sexually intimate with me, and here were my reasons why:

#1  My man's body belongs to me.  I loved reading the following verse as a soon to be wife!  Remember, I hadn't been intimate with my man yet!

The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

#2  I wanted to protect my marriage from the Enemy

Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.  1 Corinthians 7:5

#3  I wanted my husband to delight in me, not some other woman.  And I didn't want some other woman to entice him because I wanted to entice him! 

Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice with the wife of your youth. [As a] loving deer and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; And always be enraptured with her love. Proverbs 5:18,19

#4 The act of marriage is what makes a marriage different from all other relationships.  In other words, biblically speaking, you can't have sex with anyone other than your husband.

Knowing those scriptures and resolving to hold fast to them helped me as a young bride to lay the proper order for our marriage. So when the homemaking duties came, the babies entered into the world, the homeschooling began, and the outside ministries took place, my marital life (including intimacy) did not take a backseat to any of these very important responsibilities. 

Modesty and the Marriage Bed  

Let me touch on this one because I think it needs to be discussed.  Plus, I believe it will bring a greater amount of fulfillment to your intimacy.

The marriage bed is undefiled.

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.  Hebrews 13:4 (ESV)

Perhaps you have been raised in a very conservative, Christian home and you're not sure how to act.  Well, mama done taught you well!  She showed you what was modest and what was not and what was appropriate and inappropriate for a lady.  She has helped you act in such a manner that it caught your man's eye and ultimately, you became his wife!

But mama's time teaching you is done.....at least when it comes to the marriage bed.  Your gauge for what to do and how to act in the marriage bed is what your man wants, not what your mama taught you!

Wannna know how to act, just ask your husband what he likes!  Yes, it is that easy.  If you're newly married, he may not have all the answers just yet, but over time, he will.

If he likes a lot of makeup, then wear it.  If he likes lingerie, then wear.  If he likes high-heeled shoes, then wear them.  You get my point.

When I walk outside and go through life I try to be modest.  When I am in the house with my boys, I try to be modest, but when I am with my husband and no one else, I am not modest.  As insecure as I am about my body, I realize that my body is the ONLY naked body that my husband is biblically allowed to look at.  That's why I am eating less chocolate now!  I do what I can to make sure my husband is sexually content and he is enjoying the wife of his youth.


Many times we get busy in life meeting all of the demands and responsibilities before us and adding the act of marriage at the end of the day can seem exhausting.  Here's my advice to you.  Take a nap in the middle of the day or feed your husband a hot dog for dinner.  I'm sure he won't care if you don't cook him a 3-course meal because you decided to save your energy for the marriage bed that night!

Or sometimes our husbands are just flat out jerks and the last thing we want to do is have sex with them.  Talk to him and let him know your feelings have been hurt over XYZ issue.  Do your best to forgive him, resolve your conflict and move on.

My encouragement to you would be to protect your marriage and one of the ways that you could do this is to not deprive your husband of sexual intimacy. 

Live a poured out life for Christ,

Did you enjoy reading The Alabaster Jar?

Subscribe through email or 'like' my page on Facebook to receive future posts.

Linking up with: No Ordinary Bloghop, The Better Mom, Time Warp Wife, Far Above Rubies, Women Living Well, A Wise Woman Builds Her House, Wifey Wednesday, A Pause on the Path, Winsome Wednesday, Lessons from Ivy, A Holy Experience, Raising Arrows Beholding Glory, We Are That Family

Finding Beauty, 

I have a passion for marriage so I invite you to join me every Monday for this link-up!

Please share your post on any and all things related to being a wife, i.e. homemaking ideas, ways you minister to your husband, dating ideas, and/or hearing what the Lord is telling you about your most important earthly relationship!

Link to your actual “Marital Oneness Mondays” post, not just your general blog address--that way if readers come by later in the week, they can click your relevant post.

Don't forget to link back to this community, either by using the button below or a text link. You can find the button code here for you to insert in your post:

<a href="http://www.joleneengle.org" title="The Alabaster Jar"><img src="http://i1125.photobucket.com/albums/l599/joleneengle/maritalonenessmondaysjarbuttoncopy-2.jpg" alt="The Alabaster Jar" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

8 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Strong During Trials...& a Marital Oneness Monday Link Up!

We had moved for the 4th time in 18 months.  I felt like I had a full-time job at a mover's company along with a part-time job working at Molly Maid's as I cleaned each home we moved in and out of.

The LAST thing I felt like was a wife!  Do my hair, put on makeup, look nice for my man AND have a loving countenance?  Ya, right!  Who are you kiddin'?  As exhaustion set in I could barely get out of bed in the morning, let alone look all pretty and be as sweet as pie for my Beloved.

But that was our way of life for sometime.  It was our new normal and I didn't know when it would end. It would've been easy to get stuck in a rut and have my marriage take a new course; a course that I wasn't interested in taking.

It was time for me to pull up my bootstraps and figure this thing out because the last thing I wanted was for my marriage to feel like it was just two people going through life who happened to live under the same roof.  I married my man for a reason, and the reason wasn't just because we were good at packing and moving boxes and rearranging furniture.

Trials will always be a part of life, and as Believers, we should expect them!

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me.  Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world."  John 16:33

When the waves of the storm come crashing down, you need to figure out how to keep your marriage strong so your passion does not drown.  Here's some tips to help you.

Photo Source

8 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Strong During Trials

1. Pray together.  By doing this, you are tapping into the spiritual side of your relationship which brings more intimacy between you and your man.  (If your husband is not a Believer, ask him if he wouldn't mind you praying with him during this difficult time.)


2. Encourage each other in the Lord.


3. Work hard to keep your focus off of yourself.  When life gets real hard, it is easy for selfishness to rear it's ugly head and it can tear down and destroy your marriage.  Pray for strength and self-control so the nasty and snide comments are not uttered from your lips.


4. Stay in fellowship.  Don't forsake the assembling of saints.  This will help nourish your soul and give you sustenance needed to carry on in difficult times.


5. Keep your perspective on the eternal things.  This will help lessen your fears, anxiety, anger, and discouragement.  Remember, your trial may feel like it will last forever, but in reality, it won't because this is not our home.


6. Plan to have some alone time even if it means you stay home and put the kids to bed early.  You need to recover, rekindle, and invest in your marriage so you can weather the storms.  Put forth the effort and be creative in making this happen.


7. Don't neglect the Marriage Bed.  You need the physical intimacy to help remind you that you are still husband and wife, not just two people living under the same roof going through hard times.


8. In case the waters are so deep and you find your marriage drowning, purchase some snorkeling gear or a deep sea divers air tank so you can breathe!  In other words, have a sense of humor and find something to laugh at, even if it is something stupid.

A merry heart makes a cheerful countenance, but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken. Proverbs 15:13

I am a 'why' person.  I like to know what the point or the reason is for doing things.  So, let me give you the 'why' to doing some of these things for your marriage...

If you let your passion go....

If you are constantly at odds with your man....

If there is nothing loving about your marriage.....

EXPECT problems in wedded bliss.

And when problems become the norm, your love, your union will start to erode and break down.  Satan is very happy about this, by the way.  Then what could happen?....the talk of divorce comes up or a potential affair could be right around the corner.  God is not happy about this, by the way.

So, be fierce about protecting and safeguarding your marriage, ESPECIALLY during trials.  The last thing you need is to have a marital trial added to your existing trials!

Live a poured out life for the Master,

Did you enjoy reading The Alabaster Jar?

Subscribe through email or 'like' my page on Facebook to receive future posts.

Linking up with: No Ordinary Bloghop, The Better Mom, These Five of Mine Plus Two, Raising Arrows, Time Warp Wife, Far Above Rubies, Women Living Well, A Wise Woman Builds Her House, Deep Roots at Home, Wifey Wednesday

I have a passion for marriage so I invite you to join me every Monday for this link-up!

Please share your post on any and all things related to being a wife, i.e. homemaking ideas, ways you minister to your husband, dating ideas, and/or hearing what the Lord is telling you about your most important earthly relationship!

Link to your actual “Marital Oneness Mondays” post, not just your general blog address--that way if readers come by later in the week, they can click your relevant post. And link back to this community, either by using the button below or a text link. You can find the button code here for you to insert in your post:

<a href="http://www.joleneengle.org" title="The Alabaster Jar"><img src="http://i1125.photobucket.com/albums/l599/joleneengle/maritalonenessmondaysjarbuttoncopy-2.jpg" alt="The Alabaster Jar" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

After 14 Years, I Still Can't Fit into My Wedding Dress

It was over 14 years ago when I stood in that checkout line with the man I was engaged to be married to.  As we stood there waiting our turn for our groceries to be rung up, my Beloved noticed the tabloid magazines on display.  One had a caption that read, “Why Get Married.”  My godly fiance replied, “So I can get Jolene in bed.”

Dismayed by what I heard, my jaw dropped to the floor and I am certain my face turned several shades of red.  I was completely offended by his callous, unromantic, not to mention, ungodly response as to why he and I should be united in marriage!

Perhaps I said his comment was offensive, (I can’t remember now that so many years have passed) or maybe he saw the look of utter shock on my face, therefore, he proceeded to explain himself.

He, being a direct and straight to the point, kinda man, shared that you can be friends with each other and do all sorts of things together.  You can be emotionally, mentally and even spiritually connected, but one thing you can’t have according to God’s Word, is to be united physically.  The act of marriage, aka, getting me in bed, is ONLY reserved for a husband and wife.

But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.  1 Corinthians 7:2 (NLT)

I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, Do not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases.  Song of Songs 8:4

Well, that made complete sense to me.  In a nutshell, the act of marriage is what makes a marriage different from any other relationship.  I took that concept and held onto it for the next 14 years allowing it to change me into a wife.

You see, I grew up as a tom boy.  Competitive sports, ponytails and sweaty clothes.  Certainly not a girlie-girl, and on top of all of that, I was a take charge kinda woman yet, coming to Christ and becoming a wife, changed all of that.  My heart was to learn how to be a God-fearing woman; or should I say, a feminine lady.

14 years ago today, my wedding day was the epitome of biblical femininity.

It was the second best day of my life.

The day I said, “I Do” to becoming his wife.

Surrendering my life into his hands; submitting to him until death do us part.

I expected him to lead me; lead me to Christ.

No, I didn’t walk down the aisle in a wedding pant-suit, rather, I wore a wedding dress.   A white, form-fitted, elegant dress.  Every ounce of it screamed femininity, along with what I wore underneath it. (wink)

Mr. and Mrs. Eric Engle

March 14, 1998

But when my babies came into the world they changed my body.  The girlish figure I retained until I was 30, was now turning into a woman’s.  The widening of my hips made it impossible to squeeze into my most favorite dress!

A dress that symbolized a

romantic love,

a bride,

vows,

the coming together physically,

and when the ceremony was over, the dress symbolized….a wife.

So, today as a wife I am nowhere near the same size I was on the day I got married!  I was a skinny mini thing back then, but I had to starve myself and workout endlessly to get that way.  Yet in spite of all of that, I was oh so self-conscious of standing bare-skinned before my new husband on our wedding night!  I know I am not alone in this, even the Shulamite woman who married Solomon had her insecurities as well!

Do not look upon me, because I am dark, because the sun has tanned me.   Song of Solomon 1:6

I soon realized on my honeymoon how the negative view I had of my body could hinder my marriage bed.  I didn't want those insecurities to come between us, so I continued to workout and watched what I ate in the years to come.

But when the babies were born, so did the chronic illnesses, the thyroid and hormone issues along with the physical limitations of my body.  Infections took place in my body that ravaged the marriage bed for a long period of time.  Family persecutions happened.  Homeschooling needed to fit into the schedule.  Financial turmoil made life difficult.  And of course there was outside ministry as well.

The weight came on and it didn't want to go off.  My metabolism came to a screeching halt.  More cellulite was added to my body, along with fat rolls, a muffin top, and a big fat baby pooch.  All areas that I wanted to cover up.  Why couldn't my feet get fat instead of my waist?  As well, I've come to realize that I am allergic to standing on my bathroom scale; it makes me depressed and there is no allergy medicine to reduce the reaction, except for working out and watching what I eat!

I am thankful for a husband who did not marry me for my outer appearance and for not complaining about my body over the years.   He married me because of the heart I have for the Lord and he knows that beauty is fleeting.   And when I get depressed about my body, he reminds me that my job is not to be a super model.  However, I know when I walked down the aisle that day, I was not walking down to marry Jesus!  No, I was marrying a man.  A visual, flesh-filled man.  A man who enjoys seeing my hair curled, lipstick on my lips, high heels on my feet, and sweet smelling perfume on my body.   Just like the day I walked down the aisle as his bride!  He's a typical husband wanting to enjoy the beauty of his wife.

So, even if I can't fit into my wedding dress anymore, I am still a wife.  A feminine lady who wants to be pleasing to her husband with her countenance and her outer appearance.  Regardless of how difficult life has been for me, I still try to look and act feminine for my man.

You have ravished my heart, my sister, my spouse; You have ravished my heart with one look of your eyes, with one link of your necklace.  How fair is your love, my sister, my spouse! How much better than wine is your love, and the scent of your perfumes than all spices!  Your lips, O my spouse, drip as the honeycomb; Honey and milk are under your tongue; And the fragrance of your garments is like the fragrance of Lebanon.  Song of Songs 4:9-11

Here's a few things I have learned over the course of our 14 years of marriage:

1. Maintain a submissive attitude towards my husband.  As a result of this, he feels honored and I feel cherished.


2. The more feminine I become, the more manly he becomes.  Today I wear more lipstick and skirts and less sweatpants now that I am married.


3. I have learned not to over commit myself to outside ministry because it will hinder my marriage.  I just don't have time to do it all!


4. Homeschooling (or parenting, if you happen not to homeschool) is a black hole.  It can swallow me and my marriage up and it can become an idol in my life if I allow it.  Therefore, we will not bow down to the altar of academics.  I can't and shouldn't do everything and it's okay to let some things go.


5. My Beloved is my husband and that means he is my first ministry and comes before all others.  Exercising and eating right is a part of that ministry to him because he is to physically delight in my body, and I don't want to deprive him of that because of my insecurities.  I fail daily in these areas because who in their right would like to eat salad and veggies and limit their chocolate and dessert intake, especially when life gets hard and you start to recognize that you have become an emotional eater?  I'll let you know right now that I  will not be the first one to raise my hand on that one, but, nonetheless, I will keep trying!


6. If my marriage bed is hindered, so is my marriage.  This propels me to work on being physically attractive for my man even with all of my physical limitations, time constraints, or when I don't want to curl my hair because I am lazy!  Yet, I am mindful of keeping a balanced life and making sure my outer appearance does not become an idol as well.

Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth. She is a loving deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you always. May you always be captivated by her love. Why be captivated, my son, by an immoral woman, or fondle the breasts of a promiscuous woman?  Proverbs 5:18-20 (NLT)

No, taking care of my body is not easy and I could come up with every excuse in the book...and be justified in using it.  But the last thing I want to do is rob my husband (or myself!)  from the blessings of physical intimacy that we get from being married.  Yes, we have a great friendship, but I want a great marriage as well, and we all know what sets those two relationships apart....it's the act of marriage!

His left hand is under my head, and his right hand embraces me. Song of Songs 2:6

So, do you struggle with maintaining a pleasing outer appearance for your husband as well?  What do you do to overcome your struggles?  I'd love to hear your ideas!

Live a poured out life for the Master,

Did you enjoy reading The Alabaster Jar?

Subscribe through email or 'like' my page on Facebook to receive future posts.

I am linked up with:  Raising Mighty Arrows, No Ordinary Bloghop

One Simple Tip to Better Your Marriage in One Day

One simple thing.

Something that is set apart for just you and your husband.

Now, here's what you can do so you can be ready to implement this one simple tip:

• Pretty yourself up (like you did when you were dating) :)


• Take a nap if you need to so you'll have the energy later


• Go for a walk that day and forgo dessert if you feel self-conscious about your figure


• Turn down the lights and light a few candles so the stretch marks and cellulite are hidden


• Put on something that he likes

then......

Take your man to bed, please him and delight in him.

That's it.

One simple thing to better your marriage.

So, why is this one simple tip so effective?

Sex, a.k.a, the 'act of marriage' requires vulnerability and transparency.

It's awfully hard to be angry at your man during the act of marriage.

It's awfully hard to feel resentment and bitterness towards your man during the act of marriage.

It's awfully hard to feel disrespect and disappointment in your man during the act of marriage.

It's awfully hard to feel worried or concerned about your circumstances during the act of marriage.

Repeat this one simple tip often.

Soon you'll see your marriage getting stronger as the two of you grow closer together.

Live a poured out life for the Master,

Did you enjoy reading The Alabaster Jar?

Subscribe through email or 'like' my page on Facebook to receive future posts.

I am linked up with:

Top 15 Things a Woman Can Do to Strengthen Her Marriage

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, 

but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones. 
Proverbs 12:4

1. Respect your husband
…and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:33

2. Believe in him

3. Encourage him

4. Follow him

5. Make him Number #1 in your family life (little lord, after your Lord and Savior)

…being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror. 1 Peter 3:5,6

6. Help him and serve him

And the LORD God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”

7. Accept him

8. Desire him

9. Forgive him- let things go (bitterness)

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

10. Don’t treat him like a child; you are not his mother, you are his wife.

11. Be content with how much money he makes

12. Be content with his parenting skills

13. Be content with his walk with the Lord (aka, his ability to be the spiritual leader of the home)
Now godliness with contentment is great gain. 1 Timothy 6:6

14. Be a godly wife; your conduct will help your husband rise to the challenge/occasion of being a more godly husband.

Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives. 1 Peter 3:1

15. Leave and cleave; make sure you share your heart with your husband more than with anyone else, including your mother, sister, friends, etc.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:24