Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Why God Has Not Called Me to Get a Job (Part 3)


Should you get a job in this declining economy?  That's the question of the day to the married woman with children.  

I am going to dive right into the biblical verses to help you with your decision.  If you have not read Part 1 and Part 2 of Why God Has Not Called Me to Get a Job, please take the time to read them so you'll know where I’m coming from.

For many days now I have prayed for the Lord to guide me as I write this post because I know some women may be angry and perhaps even a bit offended by what I write, however, that is not my intention.   I am sure there are many of God’s beautiful and wonderful daughters out there working real hard to help provide for their family due to the economy.  There may even be some sisters reading this that may be going on one job interview after another, and others still wondering if they are doing the right thing by not getting a job.  Let me reassure you that I truly do understand your anxieties, fear and pain.

If you haven't been following my story, just this week we moved out of our home that was foreclosed up and the dress you see in this picture is my beautiful wedding dress that was hung to sell at our yard sale a few weekends ago.  Two things I held dearly in my heart are now gone, yet, I have still not gotten a job and below I will explain the Biblical reasons why not.


First, let me begin by telling you that I am not worthy to type His words, His love, His admonition, His charge, nor His exhortation to you.  Who am I but just another one of His daughters?  Yet, He has called me to write this, a letter that may convict some. “For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires.”  Hebrews 4:12   

But before I go any further, let me first state that whether we work outside of the home or stay at home, we are all on the same team.  Team Jesus.  Jesus said, "For he who is not against us is on our side.  Mark 9:40

Note:  For the woman who is angry when she reads this: please know that the Word of God does NOT condemn, but rather it convicts the heart as the Holy Spirit moves throughout your soul.  (Satan is the one who condemns.  Jesus NEVER does.)  There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.”  Romans 8:1

I want to make sure this counsel and encouragement is very clear.  I am writing to the married woman who is still raising children.

This post is NOT written to:
·       Single women
·       Single mothers
·       Widows
·       Married women with adult children

Let’s dig into God’s Word to help direct us for our role as a mother.  We’re going to start at the beginning of the Bible in the book of Genesis, chapter 3, verse 16:
·       To the woman He said: "I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you."

“In pain you shall bring forth children” is the portion of Scripture that I’d like to discuss right now.  Notice that the verse does not say, ‘babies’?  Generally speaking, when we think of this verse, we just associate it with labor pains as we are about to give birth to a ‘baby’, yet the verse clearly states, 'children', which is obviously older than a baby.  The verse is not referring to labor pains only.  Here's something else for you to ponder...And why would you have sorrow with 'conception'? (unless of course you weren't looking to 'raise' another child!)

Now comes the word ‘sorrow’.  Let me ask you a question.  If you gave birth to a living, breathing baby, did you equate that day as a day of sorrow?  I think not!  The ‘sorrow’ did not come until we started raising the child, (bringing forth, if you will.)  

'In pain and sorrow' is part of the curse for the woman, because we are bringing up ‘children’.  Motherhood is hard work.  We are shaping a child and dealing with their behaviors and attitudes; it's an ongoing process.  If any of you have children, you know that when the baby was born you received them with great joy, not sorrow.  (For those of you who have two year olds or teenagers you might have more sorrow than joy right now.) 


Now the verses below deal with our role and responsibility as a wife and a mother:

·       "She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness." Proverbs 31:27
·      “the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things-- that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed."  Titus 2:3-5

The Word clearly states that as a married woman with children we are called to be homemakers and we are to watch over our household.  Now, in our society that position is frowned upon because the 'world' does not hold that position in high esteem.  If you are a very intelligent person, perhaps you feel like you'd be wasting your time by being a stay at home mom rather than pursuing a career.  Don't be fooled by Satan's lie if you believe that.  Sorry, but society is not very bright! I, the Lord, speak truth; I declare what is right.”  Isaiah 45:19

Where does it say in the Titus 2:3-5 verses that a woman should be a homemaker ONLY if her husband makes enough money for her to stay at home?  It's not there ladies!  Don't be deceived.  God's Word is clear.

The Almighty God wrote those verses.  The Great I Am etched out His perfect plan for your role as a wife and mother.  Don't just discard it and think that you need to aspire to be something more.  It is not enough for you to be in the center of His will?  “All His words are true.”  Psalm 119:160  

Since I am a married woman with children that I am still raising, I am going to give you the answer as to why God has not called me to get a job....
"so the Word of God is not blasphemed."  Titus 2:5

Bottom line:  if you are married with children that still need to be raised, it is a part of God's plan for you to be the one to raise them.  I tried to tell you earlier that this post might cause you to be angry...I guess I should've told you to have some chocolate by your side while you were reading it!


Just because the economy has changed that does not mean the Word of God has.

The position a wife and mother holds will receive eternal benefits that a paycheck here on earth can never measure up to.

Don’t be misled.  Even if other Christian, married women with children are getting jobs during this economy that does NOT mean its God’s best for your family! 

I know you may feel as if you're drowning, just let go and surrender to Him!  Loosen your control and He’ll rescue you because He is your Life Preserver.  Your faith will go deeper as a result of this.  His glory will be revealed through you and He will do miracles, because He is the Miracle Maker!

You might not think I don't understand your pain and uncertainty.  But I do! I sit here typing this post from my bedroom, but not just any bedroom because this room is not my home but a home of dear sweet friends of ours.  Although I no longer have a house to call my own, I look to the Heavens where my permanent dwelling place will be.

Yes, I can get a job so I can live in my own home and still keep my possessions but I would be outside of God's will for my life and no amount of money and a false sense of security is worth it for me because I would rather be obedient to my Savior, my King and my God.

Take my life Jesus...my dress, my home, my possessions and let it be yours.  Use them for your glory.  Yes, there are tears in my eyes when I type these words but one day every tear of mine will be in His bottle.  He laid His life down for mine and the least I can do is give up a few worldly possessions to be the woman, wife and mother that He has called me to be.  Scars and pain are part of a greater plan.  The narrow path is certainly not the easiest path, but it is the path that will lift Him up for all to see.


Be in prayer about your decision.

Heed His Word because there will be ramifications if you don't.  (I will address the negative impact that working outside of your home can have on your marriage along with the relationship you have with your children at the end of this series.)

Take a leap of faith. 

Be strong in the Lord.

You won't regret it.

Join me soon (from my little bedroom) for Part 4, where I'll address, if your husband wants you to get a job.  Plus, I will tackle the following verses:
·       She considers a field and buys it; from her profits she plants a vineyard.  Proverbs 31:16
·       She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies sashes for the merchants.  Proverbs 31:24
 

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2 comments:

  1. I'm so glad I've gound your blog. I have been a SAHM for about 12 years now and will continue to do so since our youngest is three and a half. I have a question I would like your input on and am hoping to hear from you. Our youngest (of two) is a very active little girl who, it seemed, needed preschool this year. She goes 3 days a week about 5-6 hours each day. She was wearing me out!! After reading your series on Why God Hasn't Called Me to Get a Job this question has been rolling around my heart! I still like I am 'raising' our bundle of energy but am I kidding myself? Should she be home with me the entire week? There is no need for her to be in preschool since I am home except her energy and what we felt she could get from being with her peers. As a side note, my husband works a firefighter-like schedule that keeps him from home 3 nights out of the week, in which it's just me and the girls at home. During those days and nights my time for feeling like I have a break is when baby girl is in preschool. Is this an excuse for her to be in school? Am I fooling myself? I checked through scriptures but found nothing relating to this and would love your thoughts on my conundrum! In Christ, Mindi

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  2. Hi Mindi,
    Thanks for the question. You are right about not finding a specific answer in the Scriptures about your situation, so that is when you use Biblical principles to help you in your decision making.
    My eldest son is full of energy and has been since he was in my womb! So I hear you, girlfriend!! When my youngest boy was born (my two sons are 21months apart) I became sicker and I could barely get through the day. My husband owned his own business and he was gone a lot. I didn't have any family help with my young kids and my busy 3 1/2 year old boy was WEARING ME OUT! We decided to put him into a Christian preschool twice a week for 3 hours each day. We felt it would give me a much needed break, especially since I was chronically ill and I had an 18month old to care for as well. My busy boy was extremely social as well so we felt it was a win-win situation. I never put him in for the academic reasons that some do, seeing how I had plans to homeschool him. Things were okay with him the first few weeks, but I started to notice that around week 3 or 4 his character was starting to change. He was becoming Mr. Crabby pants each time I picked him up from preschool. My number one concern was to make sure his character didn't lessen because of his peers, but unfortunately that was starting to happen. He was becoming more and more argumentative and defiant with me and yet he had only gone to preschool for a total of 6 hours each week! For my family and for the sake of my son's character we felt it was best to pull him out of that situation because his behavior was worsening. So we brought him home so I could shape his character more and be the bigger influence on him. He went to preschool a total of 12 times. The Bible gives us as parents the mandate to raise up our kids in the Lord and each family does that differently. The verses that I applied in my situation were: Bring them (children) up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Eph. 6:4, Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Ephesians 6:1, Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6 My son needed to be at home in order for me to do those things. God has placed our children in our care for a short time. The kids ultimately belong to the Lord. My desire is to raise up God-fearing children that will make an impact for eternity. I want them to be using their gifts, talents and skills to build God's kingdom. So for me, as difficult as it was to have my busy guy home with me ALL THE TIME (it still is and he's 12 now!) I had to lay aside me (my flesh) because the season of motherhood is so short. Breaks are DEFINITELY needed in motherhood. We need to get rest and feel refreshed, or we become a worn-out, snappy mommy. I had to become very creative with my days so I could get through them and of course, we eventually did. I am glad I made the sacrifice to bring him home where he belongs because he wasn't ready to be in the world.
    For your situation, it sounds like the Holy Spirit is stirring your heart to have your girl home? Maybe come up with some creative ways to make your time with her a little easier? Playdates? Mops? Something that can refresh you as well. Talk with your husband and find out what is in his heart about your situation. Be obedient to what he says because he is the head of the home.
    Hope this helps,
    ~jolene

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Your kind remarks bless me tremendously!

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